My Relationship Rules: The Pornographer


My 70 year old Dad is still one of the funniest and most intriguing characters I’ve ever met. He was one of Australia’s earliest pioneers of pornography in the early 1970’s, one-time brothel owner, serial adulterer and overall nice guy. I decided to ask him – what are your relationship rules?

Why’d you leave finance and investing for pornography?

By accident sweetheart – I wanted to help my girlfriend. Her daughter was a prostitute in Kings Cross during the 70’s. They wanted to buy the shop and start a business so I lent them (the girlfriend and her hooker daughter) the money. The daughter fuc*ed off with her junkie boyfriend and I broke up with the girlfriend. My investment business was slowing down and I had to do something with the (sex) shop so I decided to leave finance for retail.

What was Kings Cross like in the 70’s and 80’s?

It was totally different. Kings Cross was the must go place – the red light district was like a carnival. Not like this sleaziness you have now. The Cross was such a village, it was so beautiful; the shop owners, the prostitutes, the bikers and the police – we were on the same side. If there was any trouble we’d sort it out, us against them. When I was there everybody knows me, it was the place to be.

Did you have similar drug and social problems?

Whenever you have strip clubs you’ll always have drugs, and you’ll always have junkies. In the old days it wasn’t as obvious – we still had pride – but nowadays…they’re disgusting. They line up in the early hours waiting for they’re methadone shots. The (shooting) clinic is ruining the area and the local businesses.

All the top brothels have moved to the suburbs and residential areas because you can park and its anonymous. During the 70’s and 80’s the prostitutes were still glamorous and were constantly on display – they just walked up and down the strip. Now…all junkies.

What were some of your early difficulties?

I was so innocent. The only Asian in the industry. I knew nothing about Police Protection or the underworld. I was raided by the Riot Squad 2 weeks after I moved into the shop. I didn’t know that you needed to pay them.

What was your relationship like with the Police Force?

After time we became friends, I covered for them and they knew they could trust me. We (all the strip clubs, brothels and sex shops on the strip) needed police protection, so I became like a shield between them and the police, organizing payments and so on.

You’ve got to learn how to play the system. We’d organise premeditated raids on the sex shops in the area (it’s still illegal to sell – not own – x rated material in NSW).  The shops would pay a small fine and the cops appeared to be doing their job. Everyone was happy.

What rules did you abide by?

No drugs, no child porn. Both are morally wrong.

Does pornography have a negative affect on relationships?

No, my clients were decent people who are just honest with themselves. They’re family men, staying true to their wives. They just want some fantasy, some titillation. They put a tape on, masturbate and then go to sleep – that’s it.

How many times have you been married?

I don’t know, I can’t remember.

Were you polygamous?

No, I just liked woman.

Do you regret being such an adulterer?

Yes, it’s hard to keep up the lies. And after a while it’s all just ego. You cheat to make yourself feel more powerful. It’s the power that’s seductive not the woman.

What’s the best relationship advice you can give?

Don’t be afraid to play bluff. Never ever reveal your cards. Once a person thinks they have you or they know you – the games over. Always keep them wanting more. Keep your life, your money and your independence. That way if some bastard ever wrongs you or hits you, you’re free to leave

Thanks Dad  - I love you forever x