Loving Boundaries


It’s been a shitty few weeks. My Dad got sick, work has been in a constant state of upheaval and I had a falling out with one of my best mates. I’m normally pretty good at ‘letting things go’ and ‘accepting the present moment’ but the combination of an unwell family member, career uncertainty and an out-of-sync relationship was too much for my already fragile ego and slightly tender heart.

My Chinese fortune cookie spoke of better days with these potent words of truth “You will pass a difficult test that will make you happier and financially better.”

I fu*king well hope so Mr Fortune Cookie.

Astrology dot com talked about 3 raging eclipses that would be challenging yet potent. I’m no star-gazer but I’ve always been taught that every interaction and experience (no matter how shitty) is like holding up a big mirror to yourself, and only with humility – and a side serving of grace – can you truly see the gift and the beauty in each experience.

I get it, I’m the creator of my own reality and I have a responsibility to learn from every experience.

I’ve spent the last few weeks embracing my own pain and confusion in order to absorb the lessons that I need to learn in order to “shift my reality” (Louise Hay speak) and to learn from the challenge.

These 2 simple truths have become the bedrock of my practice –

Loving Boundaries

We all have a choice to contract out of fear or expand into love.

My usual response to stress and pressure is to contract and retract. I tend to internalize my feelings and build walls to help shield myself from the next wave of hurt.

Boundaries are healthier, they’re fluid and can open and close but are rooted in a deep sense of self-compassion for what (or who) you will and won’t accept into your space.

My current practice is to remain loving and open to change, accepting of challenges and compassionate towards those around me.


Gratitude must be one of the most overused words in spiritual / self–help circles; its nauseating but effective to help reframe your thoughts and emotions, ie –

I’m grateful that my Dad has mostly recovered and is getting stronger daily.

I’m grateful for the love (and the health) of my beautiful Mumma and the support of my wonderful Pa.

I’m grateful that I have a peaceful home and loving partner.

Whilst my heart is a little sad I ultimately trust in the power of the experience and that the universe, god, goddess whoever or whatever is out there always has my back

Our thoughts AND emotional reactions determine our reality – but both beauty and horror exists in the world. We need to start seeing every interaction and event as an opportunity to show up, to choose love as opposed to fear and to practice tolerance and kindness instead of fear and contraction.

The universe will only ever give you the lessons or experiences that you truly need and are ready for. In many cases you’re being taught humility whilst being pushed towards more growth and opportunity.

Embrace it, run with it and let it rip. I see you beautiful and I love you all the more for it.

PS – I’m grateful you’re here and I thank you for reading. Heart you long time. Love Tmah x

WellnessTanya MahComment